Sooooo…here’s the whole point of the matter, here’s what I’ve processed over the last year.
REVELATION(S)
First weeks upon return to the U.S. –
1) Even though living in the “upper room” was NOT our idea of “how to be a missionary in Italy”, it is extremely obvious to us that God had us right there for a very definite reason. We were able to see up close and personal a particular problem with the church in Vicenza that we later found out is a problem with churches all over Europe. It is nothing we can expound upon in this testimony, but it was definitely an eye-opener.
2) It is likely as well that God had us there so we could physically pray over the city. Randall came through on this one, but boy, I sure didn’t. I was too busy hanging on for dear life.
3) 03-16-2010-We received this daily devotional from: Today God Is First (TGIF) devotional message, It reads as follows:
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." - John 12:24 Almost every significant thing God births He allows to die before the vision is fulfilled in His own way.
-Abraham had a vision of being the father of a great nation (birth). Sarah was barren and became too old to have children (death). God gave Abraham and Sarah a son in their old age. He became the father of a great nation (fulfillment).
-Joseph had a vision that he would be a great leader and that many would bow down to him (birth). Joseph's brothers sold him to some merchants and he became a slave. Later he was falsely condemned to spend his years in prison (death). God allowed Joseph to interpret the dreams of the butler and baker and later the king, whereupon, he was made a ruler in the land (fulfillment).
-Moses had a vision of leading his people out of the bondage of Egypt (birth). Pharaoh as well as his own people drove Moses out of Egypt after Moses' first attempt to relieve their bondage (death). God gave Moses signs and wonders to convince Pharaoh to free the people and bring them out of Egypt and into the Promised Land (fulfillment).
-The disciples had a vision of establishing the Kingdom of God with Jesus (birth). The very ones He came to save killed Jesus, and the disciples saw Him buried in a tomb (death). God raised Jesus from the dead, and the disciples performed great miracles until the gospel had spread through all the world (fulfillment).
-A grain of wheat has a "vision" of reproducing itself and many more grains of wheat (birth). The grain dies in the ground (death). A harvest springs up out of the very process of "death" in the ground (fulfillment).
Has God given you a vision that is yet unfulfilled? If that vision is born of God, He will raise it up in His own way. Do not try to raise the vision in your own strength. Like Moses, who tried to fulfill the vision of freeing the Hebrews by killing the Egyptian, it will only fail. But wait on your heavenly Father to fulfill the vision. Then you will know that it was His vision when He fulfills it in the way only He can do. (CopyrightbyOsHillman,Marketplace)”
Date: Wed, 14 Apr 2010 10:17:29 –0500 – an email I sent out to 3 friends:
After some deliberation i decided to watch one i've watched at least 2 other times (a Beth Moore video on LifeToday) called "The Presence of God", because one of my most unanswered questions about what happened in Italy was where was the presence of God during that struggle. It's based on the account in Exodus 33 when God told Moses that He would send an angel to lead them to the Promised Land and give them every victory and all the milk and honey they could stand, but that God Himself would not go with them because He might "destroy their scrawny necks" (Beth Moore translation). And Moses tells God that if He is not going with them, they are not going, no deal. So after a conversation between God and Moses when God tells him that He will go with them after all, Moses says "Show me Your glory."
vs. 21-23: Then the Lord said, "There is a place near me where you may stand on a rock. When My glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with My hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove My hand and you will see My back; but My face must not be seen."
Beth Moore: “The picture of seeing God, not from the front because His face cannot be seen, but from the back. And when we come out on the other side and look back we see that God was there all along, putting people in my path, causing people to minister to me, keeping me up on my feet when i wanted to crawl under something and stay...At the times when it seems to be the darkest, could it be because He has covered me with His hand...the darkness is because the hand of God is so close to me that i can't see the other side. It's not about what we feel, but that we KNOW - that my God is loyal to me, a God of covenant.”
Is it not amazing, pathetically amazing, that i've listened to this lesson 2 other times, and it did not stick with me in Italy? (maybe it's only good on American soil)
And that's not the only thing we forgot. Did Randall ever tell you about the vision God gave him when we were in Italy? I totally forgot it, until it came out of Randall's mouth this past Sunday at church, as he was recounting it to someone else.
Randall's vision: He was downstairs in the church auditorium, 3rd day of fasting & praying, face-down on the floor, for God to hear us, answer us, help us, show us His glory, anything. He looked up and around himself (he can’t remember if he looked up in the vision or physically) and saw Emily & Andrew curled up like mice, asleep, and i was asleep next to him. All 3 of us were sleeping peacefully, but we were all on fire, all 4 of us, yet it was a peaceful. He saw something from his peripheral vision, and when he looked, a man with an ornate square-sided shovel was scooping ashes out from under us and putting them on the altar of incense. Then he looked up and saw the 4 horns and realized we were on the Brazen Altar of sacrifice. Then the words flowed over Randall saying “You are the sacrifice… and I AM pleased with you.”
Almost as amazing as the vision itself is the fact that it didn't stay with me when i fell apart in Italy. Perhaps the Hand of God was so close to our faces that we couldn't even receive a vision from Him with anything but dullness.
Also – “Why couldn’t Peter stay afloat through the power of Christ Jesus (when Jesus had allowed him to step out of the boat and walk on the water)? Because Peter switched his focus from Christ to his circumstances (the storm), while Christ remained tightly focused on His destination.” – Beth Moore Fruit of the Spirit, p. 105
And – Job 23:8-10 “But if I go to the east, He is not there; if I go to the west, I do not find Him. When He is at work in the north, I do not see Him; when He turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of Him. But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold.”
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